Why “Showing Up” is So Important in Relationships

“I give you my word” – in times past, this was considered the equivalent of a written contract; a man’s word was binding. Once given, it would be unthinkable to renege on; such an action would cause a loss of good faith in him, and could affect his business, personal life and reputation.

In the times we live in, however, people’s word seems to count for less and less. How many times have we agreed to plans with friends, family, or our SO, only to back out later on, pleading work demands, tiredness or, sometimes, just out of plain laziness. Yes, things come up; yes, sometimes changing your plans is unavoidable, but I, for one, would love to get back to a place where a person’s words means something and can be counted on.

We are all busy with the various demands of life, but any friendship or relationship will require some give-and-take, some sacrifice. Showing up for the people you care about builds their trust and faith in you; a belief and knowledge that you will be there for them.  This is what separates you from the billions of other people in the world; this is what makes you special– you care about them.

Granted, friendship means different things to different people, but I very much doubt there is a single person who doesn’t expect their friends to be there for them when they say they will be.

Sticking to your word and showing up when you say you will is how you build trust and respect in each other – and no friendship or relationship can survive for long without those elements. Over time, the less you “show up”, the less that those who are important to you will feel they can rely on you, which can cause a sometimes irreparable distance. It might not bring about an end to the friendship, but then again, it might, and are you willing to lose someone important to you?

“When enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything.”

Jon Snow says that, and, just because it’s on HBO, it doesn’t make it any less true.

Showing up, translated, means: Showing you care. Don’t forget that.